I solved that problem a long time ago, way back in 1984, when I left my 2nd husband. I've been on my own since then, tho I did have a few years when I had housemates.

See, the thing is, when women move in together they start out deciding who will be responsible for which chores. We divided up the "public" rooms: living room, dining room, kitchen, and bathroom/staircase. One did the kitchen, another did the dining/living rooms (a lot less mess to clean up so they got 2 rooms), and the bathroom, hallway, and staircase. That way it was easy to see immediately who was "falling down on the job."

We cooked and ate at different times, so there was no cooking to share. We brought our dishes to the sink and scraped them to remove loose food, then put them in water to soak. In the evening, the kitchen person washed the dishes--a fairly easy job because the dishes had soaked for several hours.

It worked beautifully.

The problem with men is that even tho they may be willing to do more of the work, they leave it to the woman to organize it and stay on top of it all.

The "solution" offered here still leaves a great deal to be desired.

There needs to be a discussion straight off among the people who will be living in shared space and a way to easily figure out if someone is sloughing off.

We NEVER had to go after anyone. Our responsibilities were limited because shared. When someone was sick, we picked up their duties.

I know there are a lot of people who have let themselves fall into bad habits. So, have a "house meeting" and work it out. No whining allowed. Period.



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Georgia NeSmith

Retired professor, feminist, writer, photographer, activist, grandmother of 5, overall Wise Woman. Phd UIA School of Journalism & Mass Communication, 1994.